Well yesterday I met with 3 different doctors, I've added a new specialist to my team, he is a Neuro-Oncologist and he was brought in to help figure out what to do for me. Basically, after hours of meeting with doctors they still aren't sure what to do with me.
The reason being is that my brain tumor has continued to grow over the past 4 months. It is now to the point that I'm back on steroids because it is causing symptoms that interfere with my ability to drive, see, read, walk, etc. The only solution at present is for me to go back on the High Dose, intense oral chemotherapy that I was on in the spring when we saw the reduction in the size of the tumor.
The reason we changed my dosage after those amazing results was due to my quality of life. Although my tumor was responding, the treatment was killing me! I was so very sick and spent a lot of time in bed, sick with nausea or any number of issues. We have tried to avoid putting me back on such a regimen but my doctors decided, unanimously, that this is the only option that has a chance of helping control the growth at this time.
And so, I go back down the same road again....more drugs, naps, steroids (getting fat, not sleeping, being grumpy, etc), sore feet, upset stomach, cracked hands and palms, old lady digestive challenges and more.
If there is a sun in the cloud it is that I am still alive and trying to make the most that I can with each day with my children and husband. I truly am challenged beyond my capacity at times but I am also greatly blessed.
That's all for today....
10 comments:
Love you Heidi!! You are such a fighter and truly an inspiration to me! I hate reading these kinds of posts on your blog, they make me so mad!! I just want you to be free from all of this! You will make it through this, you are so strong!! My thoughts and prayers are with you!!
Heidi - I am so sorry you're going through all this. I'm so proud to know you because of the great example of courage and faith that you are. I think about you often and am praying for you.
Kristina
Heidi,
I think of you often and love seeing all of your posts as well. I am so sorry for the trials that you are having to deal with but want you to know that so many people are praying for you and your sweet little family. Heavenly Father loves you! Stay strong and know that so many people are pulling for you!
Heidi - I'm praying for you, Scott, and the kids. You have been so strong through all of this. Please let me know what I can do for you. I'm only a short plane ride away!
Heidi,
I'm so sorry to hear this. You are in my thoughts often and I hope this next treatment can do it's job. What a horrible thing to have to go through- you are an inspiration to so many though! Big Hugs...ps I was just going through all my old photos and found one where we served all our guys (and Pete) dinner outside in my backyard. When we were all dating....do you remember that? :)
Heidi,
I am so sorry for the news you got yesterday. I am sure that the thought of going back on heavy meds is incredibly discouraging. I think about you so often and am sad that we have not been able to get together. Lets try to catch-up (in person) after Thanksgiving. In the mean time you will be in my prayers. You are one amazing person, dealing with an extraordinary trial. I know you will be blessed with the stregth to endure. I love you!
Carrie
Heidi, as always we love you and continute to pray for you!!! Hang in there and remember that you have many, many people thinking of you and rooting for you always!!
Most of us would like to believe that we could weather through the storm. You have done this! You can do this! You are a warrior in God's army! We love you, support you, and will hold you up if you get tired. Battle on, dear Heidi!
I'm not sure exactly what to say. I think of you quite often and find inspiration in your great strength, faith, and courage. You are a champion and an example to many. I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
On a side note...do you ever listen to the Mormon Channel? I love the Enduring it Well program. I listen to it with my itouch app almost every morning. As I listen to the stories of faith amid trials I have often thought of you. I think you should be on the program. You have been through a lot but continue to endure it well. Keep going and know you are loved by many.
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